All kinds of weird staging going on in this place. From the lone typewriter with no seating…

…to the pair of tall chairs just sitting by themselves in the corner.

Also: Dining with George and Martha Washington. And nothing else.

The home does have one cool feature though…

That’s the “400SF bomb shelter converted into a wine cellar.” Nice. Survivalism in style.

From the listing description:

There is even a bomb shelter in the basement that sleeps six and has a periscope from a WWII submarine (which would make an ideal wine cellar).

Pictured: the appropriate way to stock your bomb shelter. Wine, helmets, a periscope, and prison beds without mattresses.

What more would you need?

PRICED BELOW CERTIFIED APPRAISAL of $3.5 million.

Well okay, maybe if you offered them the CERTIFIED APPRAISAL amount, they would throw in PoolDog.

Gotta love the random faded-oval shot they threw in there.

Wait, wait, wait. Is that a bomb shelter with a cute little stepping stone path?

SOLD!