Honey, I shrunk the listings butler!

Wow, these are some pretty bad photos.

What kind of agent lists a $2.2 million house with photos this terrible?

Oh. That kind of agent, I guess.

This house is incredible.

I’m just not sure that it’s all the good kind of incredible.

Is that furniture in the home theatre… glowing?

Classy! That’s exactly what I would want hanging over my living room.

Okay, that pool is definitely the good kind of incredible. Can’t say I’ve ever seen such a fancy, upscale pool in a private residence before.

All this can be yours for only 77 million dollars!

After a hard day as corporate CEO, come home to your own private Versailles, complete with reflecting pool…

…formal garden…

…and grand entrance hall. Note the gold accented stair rail and expansive built-in shelving.

There’s more where that came from, along with an imperial oodles’ worth of closet space.

And when you’re ready to relax, as well as admire your royal self, retreat to your very own Hall of Mirrors, surfaced with marble, exotic hardwoods and – of course – gold-bracketed light fixtures.

Ahhh… That’s better!

That’s bound to be disorienting.

Also in this listing… creepy lonely lady sculpture:

She even appears to be pose-able.

Because who doesn’t want to look at themselves from ten different angles while they pee?

…or wash their hands:

…or take a shower: