That’s certainly an interesting piece of sculpture, and it appears a lot in this photo set. It seems odd that the listing photos would focus so much on a piece of art when the home itself is… well, have a look for yourself:

Apparently burritos are good business.

Never before on the market, this exceptional contemporary home was originally built for Steve Ells, founder of Chipotle.

Not surprisingly for someone in the restaurant business, this place has one of the nicest kitchens I’ve ever seen.

Here’s the other side of the kitchen, and a conspicuous shot of that sculpture again:

And of course what rich person’s modern home listing would be complete without the obligatory shot of the pristine garage with their sexy luxury cars?

Okay, back to the sculpture again.

Also: I hear some of you on this site like… stairs?

All right, let’s close it up with yet another shot of that sculpture.

There are lots more great photos on the virtual tour. Just beware, that link auto-plays a dumb video by default. Click “Photos->All” on the upper-left to stop the music and get to the pictures.

This home has it all! Something for everyone. The “art” lover…

The garden lover…

The high-energy kids…

The high energy adults…

…wait a minute, is that a stripper pole in the workout room?

Anyway, moving on…

It’s got a castle for the little princess…

…and a sweet arcade room for the gamers.

Of course, for $34.5 million dollars, it had better have something for everyone. With nine bedrooms, seventeen bathrooms, and 14,563 square feet there should be space to fit pretty much anything you can imagine.

In the dining room…

Even in the hallway…

Well, until you hit the home theater. It’s… um… different…

The busts are of Greek and Roman origin. Some are even of famous philosophers. But the theater is an Egyptian tomb reborn… with a dozen gold thrones seats. And a totally creepy black obelisk.

Even so, the Egyptian theater may not sport the weirdest decor. At least Greek, Roman, and Egyptian are all ancient. But this…?

Definitely a “Wait… what?” moment. I dunno, maybe the dolls count as sorta busts?

Other than this somewhat excessive fountain, this listing is a relatively normal $4.5 million Washington DC home.

Is it supposed to look like the blue man is being shot? Because that is what it looks like to me.

Other than the interesting choice of sculpture out front, the home is your pretty typical multi-million-dollar modern mansion. Oh except that it’s in Oakland, which is another interesting choice.

Honey, I shrunk the listings butler!

Wow, these are some pretty bad photos.

What kind of agent lists a $2.2 million house with photos this terrible?

Oh. That kind of agent, I guess.

Sure, okay. Why not?

In addition to… that… The seller also appears to have somewhat of a basket fetish:

So many baskets. I mean, not as many as this home from February, but still quite a few.

This home is basically the opposite of subtle.

And here we have the lovely enclosed patio, where you can relax, enjoy good company, and maybe hang someone in effigy from the ceiling. You know, whatever you’re into.

If only those happy kids on the bench knew what kind of stuff was going on inside, they would run. You know, if they weren’t made of bronze, that is.

Hey it’s a books butler.

I could do without the effigy and the other odd statues, but I’d be happy to take the Corvette…

Lots of extra photos on the “virtual tour”.

Lots of interesting sculpture in this one. Starting with the yard full of metal animals…

…continuing on the deck with the arms-up ladies.

Another arms-up lady.

Pretty sure that’s a third separate arms-up lady. Sort of an odd art obsession.

There appears to be an eight-foot-tall green spider bearing down on this home.

Or maybe it just wants to go for a dip in the pool.

That’s a garden path I think I’d be avoiding.

The giant spider’s not all this home has to offer. There’s also giant dragonfly, with its own viewing room.

That’s one way to spend your evenings, I suppose.

The seller of this home is either a big fan of Duane Hanson Sculpture or perhaps his grandma just wouldn’t get out of the shot.

Also, they’re really quite fond of their pool. It seems like half the shots are the pool. I mean, that is a pretty majestic seahorse.

It seems like they couldn’t choose a theme for the pool though. We’ve got the seahorse, some topless mermaids, a dragon, an elephant, and a panther all surrounding the pool. Quite an odd collection.

I hope you like purple, because there is a lot of it in this house.

Wait, does anyone actually live in this house? Nobody actually has a closet that organized, do they?

In case you weren’t clear what inspired the… eclectic decor in this house, just refer to the handy neon sign on the right side of this photo.

I like how the cropping on this photo makes this neon sign say “lies.”

Wow these guys really like their neon. By the way, I’m pretty sure this one says “TRACKS,” not “RACKS.”

Because trains.

That’s… um… an… interesting choice of um… art, I guess, to hang directly over your master bed. Not sure exactly what kind of message they’re trying to send to potential buyers with that.

I also like how this home was only just listed a couple of days ago, but the primary photo if of everything covered in snow.

“Hey, maybe if we plaster all the walls with framed posters and photographs, nobody will notice that we’re trying to pass an airplane hangar off as a home!”

“Twelve million dollars isn’t too much to ask for a well-kept hangar, right?”

“Hey, just to really push buyers over the edge, let’s spruce the place up with a heaping dose of creepy sculptures of little girls.”

“Great! Now we just need one in the middle of the entryway, lying face down on a tiny little pedestal, and we’ll be done.”

“Perfect!”

That’s bound to be disorienting.

Also in this listing… creepy lonely lady sculpture:

She even appears to be pose-able.

Nobody can accuse this home of being just like everything else on the market, that’s for sure. From the lead photo of the contemplative statue staring out at the water to the giant mural that appears to take up an entire two-story wall, this home definitely stands out.

From the description:

Live in a work of art on Riviera Beach! For the unique person who appreciates beauty & distinction.

No doubt.

Imagine that you’re flipping through a perfectly normal set of quality, professional listing photos when—BAM! All of a sudden you’re staring at a glass nude sculpture, with a creepy-looking hollow-eyed reflection in one of the many surrounding mirrors.

Oh wait, you don’t have to imagine this at all. You just have to click through to the listing below.

So, um… why are there giant metal Christmas trees across the street? For the answer, let’s check out the listing:

Great location on 1 block long street right across from a nice quiet park and Watts Towers, (Tony Hawk designed skate park going in next year).

Wow, sounds… great.