The rest of this house is just a nice, partially-updated 120-year-old home. But that bathroom… Whoa.

I actually saw this one in person at an open house, and these photos really do not do justice to the visual assault you experience when you walk into this bathroom.

It’s not just the ceiling and the furniture upholstery that matches…

Check out the tiles on the edge of the kitchen counter. That is dedication.

More dedication on display in the kitchen.

Not a fan of that pattern? How about this slightly different one? We’ve got it on the ceiling, chair, and drapes…

No? How about plaid?

Okay okay, one more try… You like pink, right?

Right?!?

100% tasteful.

Located on a $2.25 million half-acre lot in Malibu.

Fully stocked.

Oh look, lemons!

Inside is mostly bland, except for this bathroom…

Why would you need a mirror on the ceiling?

The rest of the flat is fairly pedestrian, but whoa, that hallway.

Why? Just why?

These sellers really like floral print wallpaper.

But they won’t be confined. They’ve got variety!

Check it out, this room even has two different floral prints on the same wall!

Upstairs they decided to eschew the floral print and just go with some bright floral colors.

Ever wonder what it would be like to live inside a rose? Wonder no more!

It seems that the sellers’ affinity for bright colors extends beyond decor choices and into their wardrobe as well. Check out all those neons in the closet.

Can you find the furniture?

This elusive species has evolved to blend in with its habitat.

Note how well each of the individual pieces disguises itself to match its surroundings.

Still wary of potential predators as they arrive at the watering hole for a drink, these specimens utilize their expert camouflage to become virtually invisible.

Lots of odd decor and furnishing choices in this $5 million Santa Monica condo found by Emerald63. You’ve got the camouflage beds…

Weird rocking chairs, and fuzzy tabletop dog bust.

Weird tables, especially with the intricate wood-carved one right next to that tall all-mirror one.

Sort of a funky color for a chandelier, and what’s with the creepy jester painting?

But all the weird stuff can be ignored…

…as long as you spend most of your time just staring outside at the awesome view.

List price: just above a million bucks.

If the buyer isn’t blind though, they’re probably going to have to budget a bit extra to tone this place down a notch.

Make that five or six notches.

The best part about this listing is how every room seems to have a dramatically different style.

And yet they’re all hideous.

Bet you can’t find the dishware.

You like patterned walls and floors, right?

This one reminds me of the giant cow ottoman featured on these pages back in February.

Why would brand new construction have a dog shrine closet? The rest of the house looks normal enough, so what the heck is going on with this closet?

Also, the only exterior photos are drawings. Does this home really exist or is it just some kind of trap placed by intelligent canines hoping to lure in unsuspecting humans for a game of fetch?

I promise you these are all the same house.

I guess 1993 was a good year?

Ugh, Mercator projection. Totally ruins it.

I’d complain about the open toilet but I’m just so relaxed, like I’m at the beach.

Did I say the beach? I meant the library. Yeah. That.

Where are the beds? YOU CAN’T SEE THEM!

Hidden sofa is hidden.

Whoa, cool outdoor dining room… HEY WAIT A MINUTE.

The current owners of this home have definitely made some… interesting decor choices. Especially in the bathrooms.

They each seem to have their own “theme.” I guess sometimes you have to be in the right mood to go?

I think my favorite room is probably the basement den though.

So that’s what it would feel like to live inside a pumpkin!

The listing description declares this home to be

A rare opportunity in North Everett.

It is rare indeed to find so many different wallpapers and patterned carpets in a single home.

You could close your eyes in this bedroom, but the wallpaper is so bright it will probably keep you up unless you spring for a sleep mask.

I appreciate how they appear to have gone to great lengths to find the perfect curtains to match the different wallpapers in every room.

No walls to wallpaper? No problem! Just find some patterned carpet, instead!

Even when you think that the wall is just a plain white color, if you look closely you’ll see that it is still actually wallpaper.