Do not attempt to adjust the picture.

120 Rivo Alto Canal, Long Beach, CA 90803

You’re looking at the only two photos for this 1.37 million-dollar waterfront listing in Long Beach, California.

120 Rivo Alto Canal, Long Beach, CA 90803

From the listing description:

This is a truly must see to capture all the beauty this house has to offer!

“Must see,” because apparently the listing agent only had a 19th-century camera on hand to take the pictures. Wait, no…

House of Maples - Iowa

Even photos taken in the 1800s look better than this listing.

About the Author

Marty E.
Naked Loon Editor-in-Chief

8 Comments on "Do not attempt to adjust the picture."

  1. Emerald63 | May 3, 2013 at 1:07 PM |

    “Must See”….. (O_o)

    From the little visual info we have, it seems to be a fantastic setting and a very nice Victorian (or Queen Anne?) home. I checked the listing and it’s close to authentic, built in 1924. It’s certainly not a modern knock-off. No matter how hard builders nowadays try, they can never quite come up with the exact look. I think it has something to do with different milling standards for timber, as well as very different thermal standards for windows and doors. All the more reason….

    To Want To See Some More Pictures!!!

    I think if Bill Clinton had been a real estate agent, the saying would’ve been “It’s the photos, stupid.”

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  2. Denita TwoDragons | May 3, 2013 at 1:32 PM |

    Oh I get it, it’s not actually a real-estate listing. It’s a Myopia Simulator. If this is what your world looks like normally, it’s time to get some expensive glasses, folks!

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  3. Emerald63 | May 4, 2013 at 2:07 PM |

    @Denita TwoDragons: “Which is better… A or B?” ~flip~ “A or B?” ~flip~

    “OK, again… which is better, A or C?” ~flip~

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  4. Denita TwoDragons | May 5, 2013 at 10:51 AM |

    @Emerald63: Gee, sounds like someone else has dealt with the Giagantic Bug-Eyed Phoropter Device Of DOOOOOOOOM!!! before… I always joked that that darn thing always worked better than any prescription I ended up with, so maybe if they found a way to strap the d*mn thing on my head I could just wear IT instead…

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  5. You can pull right up to the garage doors in Google Street View. No windows back there, but nothing much to look at anyway.

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  6. I tried crossing my eyes while looking at these pictures. Eerily enough, the doubled images appeared to (each) be in focus… but would devolve back to the blurry original if actually looked at. After a while I got tired.

    Sort of a do-it-yourself sterio-opticon toy…

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  7. …for those with entirely too much time on their hands.

    ReplyReply
  8. Emerald63 | May 7, 2013 at 1:30 PM |

    @anodean: Wouldn’t that be too much time on their eyes? ;)

    ReplyReply

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