Presidential Zombie Farm

7884 Harpine Highway, Linville, VA 22834

Who hasn’t wanted to buy a home with a bunch of President Lincoln’s ancestor’s buried in the back yard?

7884 Harpine Highway, Linville, VA 22834

Wait, probably everyone. Everyone has not wanted to buy such a home.

About the Author

Marty E.
Naked Loon Editor-in-Chief

5 Comments on "Presidential Zombie Farm"

  1. A pity there aren’t more pictures of the house, especially something from the inside. Not sure I’d want the hassle of living in a registered historic landmark, as that makes even repairs, let alone redecorating problematic. And just forget about remodeling.

    Still, if that era is your thing it would be kinda cool. I wouldn’t mind being caretaker to Abe’s ancestors, either. I’d be honored, in fact. Just as long as he managed to get rid of all the vampires, I’m cool with zombies.

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  2. Well…um…I think I’d like it! Cool place with uber history. With there were more photos inside and out.

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  3. It would be an almost unimaginable amount of work – any house that age that has been allowed to sit and peel, well, let’s just say there are likely some compelling structural reasons for no inside shots. Now add in the historical character, which would likely require such measures to be done to museum standards. Which is about all this place can be, now, a museum.

    In fact, this whiffs of the family having (finally) subdivided this problematic corner off some otherwise uncomplicated farmland so that it can be formally placed on public offer as one step in a plan to shed the thing to some trust or charity that will then have to deal with it.

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  4. Thou shalt not repaint.
    Thou shalt not renovate.
    Thou shalt not redecorate.
    Thou shalt facilitate individual and group tours on demand.
    Thou shalt remit 75% of the revenue from tours to the local historical societies.
    Thou shalt bear the expense of all upkeep and restoration work the local historic societies determine you should provide.
    Thou shalt not build anything else on, above or under the property
    Thou shalt be subject to all additional rules and regulations all the local historical societies impose upon you, which is worse than any HOA.

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  5. @Frodo: 10 Commandments… 8 Commandments… Doesn’t matter how many, you’re still screwed if you try to do anything but breathe…

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