The Listings Butler’s Spanish Cousin

509 Virginia Dare Dr., Virginia Beach, VA 23451

The listings butler strikes again! Er, well, his Spanish cousin does, anyway.

What I don’t get about this listing is how the same listing can feature this photo:

509 Virginia Dare Dr., Virginia Beach, VA 23451

And then this one:

509 Virginia Dare Dr., Virginia Beach, VA 23451

Really? They couldn’t even manage to level the camera? Sheesh.

Also, FYI. You’re basically a nobody if your 10,000 square foot estate doesn’t have a wall-mounted shark.

509 Virginia Dare Dr., Virginia Beach, VA 23451

And a zebra rug in the wine cellar.

509 Virginia Dare Dr., Virginia Beach, VA 23451

The more you know.

Found by: Christin C.

About the Author

Marty E.
Naked Loon Editor-in-Chief

7 Comments on "The Listings Butler’s Spanish Cousin"

  1. His “Spanish cousin,” El Creepo… On the upside, that does seem to be the only unleveled Pic in the bunch, though many are poorly lit. As for the shark, are we sure it isn’t an artifact that stuck around after the latest “Sharknado”?

    It’s nicer than some homes we’ve seen, but it’s still over-decorated for my tastes. I wonder what might’ve been in the awesomely vaulted master bedroom (Pic 15) if the multiple patterns had been forsaken. The main living space, though, has a nice feel to it (Pic 5, the room, not so much the decor) and there’s a sweet ‘Vette in the garage (Pic 20). But the outdoor living areas just seem… clunky.

    I do have to marvel at anything so plush having an address on Virginia Dare Drive in the Croatan community. Sure, it’s a huge step up from what the famed Miss Dare experienced while living there, but personally I’d be concerned that every time I came home, the entire neighborhood would just be gone, with no forwarding address. Well, at least it’s only 30 or so miles from The Great Dismal Swamp National Wildlife Refuge. One can never have too many outdoor activity options available if one is to go missing long term.

  2. Ai caramba! Yet another elaborate property no doubt on the market because of the lethally dangerous Listing Butler! Those white pompoms must be the last thing the previous owner saw…

  3. @Anodean: The White Pom-Poms of Death!!!!!!! NO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    BTW, we haven’t seen a lot of you lately. You OK? Hopefully not ill? Maybe just busy? Concerned inquiring minds want to know……….

  4. @Emerald63: “personally I’d be concerned that every time I came home, the entire neighborhood would just be gone, with no forwarding address.”

    Ummm, yeah- for another reason; due to a combination of land subsidence and sea level rise, the sea level at Sewells Point, just north of the jetty, has risen 16.31 inches since 1928 (86 years). And the pace accelerated noticably beginning about 1990.

    Looking at Google maps, it’s obvious the *natural* contours of the property (it’s on a sand spit) already get flooded at high tide in strong northeasters. Given that even more sea level rise aceleration is expected, how many more years before the bottom floor of this house “sparkles,” shall we say, with a fresh coating of sea salt every few weeks?

    If you want your kids to inherit your home, you’d better buy something a bit farther inland…

    IMO it’s smart of the owner to sell this property while there is still an ample supply of global warming deniers available to buy it.

  5. @Paradox: Damn, and I thought the 2+” rise you mentioned in an email recently was intense! 16.31″?! Ai caramba indeed!!!

  6. @Emerald63: That 2.55″ rise was for Mayport, Florida- *since 2001* – which is 0.10 inch per year. The rise at Sewells Point averages 0.19″ per year. Asombrosa e no deseada; a little subsidence goes a long way…

    If those white blocks on the waterfront walkway are 8″ thick (as they appear), given recent estimates of sea level rise this century of 22 to 79 inches- plus local subsidence- they will be underwater at high tide by about 2065 at the latest, perhaps by 2035 at the earliest (though things will have to accelerate sharply during the next 10 years for that to happen).

    If there’s 3′ of fill under the house I think you could expect seawater on the floors a couple times per year after 2040-45. If sea level rises at the upper rate, you would see the floors flooded daily at high tide by about 2075.

    I’d put my $7.5 Million elsewhere, I think…

  7. @Paradox: Math error; I should not write comments after midnight. The Mayport rise is also 0.19″/year…


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