Because Dinner With Horse, That’s Why. So Shut Up.

5447 Rallywood Farm Ln., The Plains, VA 20198

Um. What.

The listing describes a “magnificent 12 stall stable w/ every amenity.” I didn’t realize that dining with one’s horse was considered an “amenity.”

5447 Rallywood Farm Ln., The Plains, VA 20198

From the looks of this photo the stables are full-on attached directly to the house. Fascinating “feature.”

About the Author

Marty E.
Naked Loon Editor-in-Chief

6 Comments on "Because Dinner With Horse, That’s Why. So Shut Up."

  1. There’s a horse in the dining room. All other arguments are rendered invalid.

  2. That’s one way to have a stable home life.

    Photo 29: Add a few beagles and you could host your own fox hunt.

    Seriously, though, this reminds me of our sleeping arrangements in Earl’s Court in 1990 at the 100th Royal Tournament in London. Perhaps 1700 of us were open quartered on the second floor with the horses on one wing of the first floor. The horses had better accommodations by far. But what I remember was everyone getting sinus infections because of the dust that breezed up through the arena from the stables. Sharing air from horse stables with living quarters doesn’t sound very appealing.

  3. First thing I see every time I come in the dining room is the arse end of that taxidermied horse. Kids were inconsolable when it died, so they actually taxidermied it and bolted it to the floor. I think they said its name was “Goetz von Berlinginer something something Murgatroyd – the Elder,” or something. Once you get past his best feature to sit at the table, you get to watch it gawp at you with those glass bug-eyes like it’s begging for carrots, or something. Which apparently it used to do, because the kids would feed it off their plates – so then the kids wouldn’t eat, yadda yadda yadda.

    I’ve lost seventy pounds. I’m thinking about advertising the place as a reducing spa and renting out the stalls as guest rooms.

  4. The living space is small and hideously overdecorated. And, if someone had allergies…yikes.

  5. Looks like most of what I was thinking has been said already. Except maybe… the smell. Even if allergies and sinus infections weren’t incurred, wouldn’t the smell be an issue? I have to think even well mucked stalls would present some level.

    ‘Kay, so putting that aside, 5 bedrooms and 4 baths in only 1600 sq ft? Yikes! It woulda been nice to see something of those beds and baths. Perhaps minuteness is why they weren’t included? Also would have been nice to see the kitchen. I do love the patio, though. Gorgeous stone work and nice spaces.

    As to K’s comment… I like some of the decor, but you’re right – there’s just too much of everything. Nice fireplace, though. Works well as a transitional element from interior out to the patio, given the same stone is used.

  6. Please tell me that this is not like those seafood restaurants where the lobster tank is right in the dining room so you can choose your dinner while it’s still alive.

    Because, if so, are the humans choosing their cut of filly mignon, or is the horse choosing its “Brown Betty”? I can’t tell, so I’m going to just tuck in my claws and fold myself up into this far corner of the room, thank you very much.


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