Keepin’ it Classy in Miami

800 S Pointe Dr. #1004, Miami Beach, FL 33139

I guess when you can afford a $16.5 million condo, you don’t have to care what anyone thinks of you or your taste in “art.”

800 S Pointe Dr. #1004, Miami Beach, FL 33139

Nothing says “I am super classy” like plastering the walls with scantily-clad ladies.

800 S Pointe Dr. #1004, Miami Beach, FL 33139

In nearly every room.


About the Author

Marty E.
Naked Loon Editor-in-Chief

4 Comments on "Keepin’ it Classy in Miami"

  1. Who needs good taste when you have an uber dual shower for steamy trysts?

  2. You live in a city famous for its beaches, you have all this money, and… you spend it on pictures of what you could see every day of the week just outside your front door. Wait… what? It’s so frustrating to think how much good for how many people $16.5M could do in the right hands. Too bad the ones decorating and/or living in this place weren’t the right hands. If you’re gonna have that much money and keep it all to yourself the least you could do is spend it on quality surroundings.

    Even without the questionable wall adornments, this place does little for me, especially considering much of the decor is going to look dated within just a few years. I’m not just talking sofas and chairs, but things that will be much more costly and problematic to replace, like the cabinetry and whatever the heck that thing on the wall is in Pic 6. Ahhh, but there’s that bottomless pocket to take care of redecorating, no? For now, I would have thought said pocket could at least have paid for built in sound and TV systems. Oh well.

  3. @Emerald63: I’m with you all the way, Emerald.

    You mentioned the odd wall covering in pic 6. I could see myself talking to someone sitting in one of those chairs and being distracted by the wall. I’d be thinking, “I think I see Micky Mouse. Oh, there’s definitely a butterfly in there!” It’s like a modern Rorschach test.

    Also, I just noticed the array of candles over the table in the following photos. Are those real, as in do you have to light all those in order to have decent light? Or are they some electrical nightmare? “I think you have a light out on this candle over here.” Now to replace it… And those weird, fuzzy, multicolored chairs.

    The scenery out of the glass external walls isn’t exactly what I want to see all the time living in the city. Does anyone really love the city so much that they want to go back to their sanctuary from the hustle and bustle and bring it all in with them?

  4. @Frodo: Hidden Mickey! (For those who aren’t Disney park devotees, a Hidden Mickey is the famous 3-circle image denoting Mickey’s face and ears. They’re worked into all sorts of settings in any number of ways throughout the parks. Many park guidebooks give clues about their locations and finding them is considered a game among many visitors.)

    But what about those chairs in our Miami Hidden Mickey venue? Every time I look at them I see some of the abstract human forms found in ancient Eastern Mediterranean figurines. Considering most of those are objects of religious veneration, I’d feel mighty strange sitting in/on a look-alike. (Examples:,,

    I noticed the hanging shelf-o-candles, too. You can now buy LED candles in large sizes; some even seem to flicker. But LEDs don’t seem to fit with the high end nature of this place. Then again, neither does the dovetail repair in the table top (foreground of Pic 7). Yet that many real candles might end up leaving soot stains on the ceiling. Maybe not for a while, because they’re a few feet below, but, if used regularly, eventually they will. So perhaps they are real, but just for show? That would be fitting in this place.

    The view that concerned me most was the neighboring high rise. What’s the point of having all those huge, lovely windows if you have to draw the drapes to keep Peeping Toms with telescopes at bay? (Er, no pun intended.)


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