Um. Whoa.
Where do you even get bathroom tile like that.
I mean seriously.
As the submitter commented to me: “these owners aren’t afraid of color!”
Found by: Christin C.
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Marty E.
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The owners may not tremble in the face of colour, but I’d rather they’d at least had a few qualms about over-indulgence.
It’s interesting how bad most of the traditionally hung paintings look. Mostly they are washed out by the avalanche of colour they compete with. The idea of the painting as a unitary object, and the framed painting in particular, seems to be that it functions as a window to elsewhere; the painting is a break in the wall. That isn’t working here, and the paintings simply reinforce the assault of the wall colours on the eyes.
The bathrooms are deadly. You have to work very hard to make something utilitarian look that awful.
Imagine being ill in a place like this.
Which, given the floating paramecium shapes in the orange-and-blue bathroom, would certainly seem likely. Paradox is right… it took a dreadful amount of effort to achieve this level of awful.
Is it just me, or does the first floor look someone’s old basement college apartment? The hipster mish-mash of furniture, the concrete floor, the casually draped icicle lights on the purple wall, the three disco balls, and, of course, the bathrooms decorated while under the influence of some (or many) drug(s). How about the turquoise wall looking like a giant version of a young married couple’s refrigerator, with every *cough*damn-it-every*cough* drawing their kid has ever brought home from school?
The one moderately attired space is the master bedroom. A nice beginning on a mix of neutrals and accent colors, though the walls are a bit under-decorated and, again, the furniture looks like a starter assortment. At least the laundry room is a nice respite. No doubt it’s where they keep the enormous supply of eye bleach their guests will require before attempting to drive home.
If these folks insist on the retina-blowing palette, they should take some lessons from the folks at Behold the Boat (https://looneylisting.com/2014/08/01/behold-the-bold-boat/). It’s just as eye-popping but comes way closer to coming together than this place does (well, if you ignore the striped bedroom). And while they’re at it, some sort of concern for what the neighbors have to look at would be good, too. You know, something other than a facade that manages to be both bland and butt ugly?
IMO, this place is a whole lot of nothing for a whole lot of money. Trust me, I could do way better with my (fictitious) $2.4M.